Vorige week zei een vrouw \u2018Het gaat niet goed met me\u2019. Tissues. In \u00e9\u00e9n jaar had ze acht forse tegenvallers. Moeder dement, vriendin overleden, conflict met de baas, collega ziek, financi\u00eble ellende, verhuisd, puberzoon met problemen, man ontslagen. En nu was het op, burn-out, afgebrand, uitgeput. Soms duikt in zo\u2019n verhaal oud verdriet op, oude krassen op de ziel. Dan is het lastiger, want oude zielekrassen voeden de actuele burn-out als petroleum op een kampvuur. Ik feliciteerde haar, want ze was recordbreker met acht keer ellende.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Het burn-out record stond in onze praktijk namelijk op zeven tegenslagen. Dat is al veel, want gemiddelde vrouwen knappen af bij vijf en mannen bij drie. Maar zij was een taaie. Nu niet meer. Nu waren tissues nodig, veel tissues. Hoe verder? Ze moest maar eens de leiding nemen over haar eigen lijden. Zij mocht beslissen wanneer ze echt zou stoppen de boel overeind te houden. Morgen? Over een paar weken? Maanden kan ook, als je even doorbijt. Meer tissues. Zij koos gisteren. En welke \u00e9ne taak wil je vasthouden? Ik weet dat dit laatste nooit lukt, maar daar komt ze wel achter. Ik vertelde haar van de Burn-out Wet. \u2018Opknappen kost twee keer zoveel tijd als afknappen\u2019. Drie weken beroerder worden tot het dieptepunt betekent zes weken herstel daarna. Eerst veel slapen, daarna slecht slapen. Eerst huilen, daarna piekeren. Mocht ze eerder weer taken op zich willen nemen, ook goed. Wel moet ze beslissen welke taken eerst, welke het laatst en welke nooit meer. Want zij is de baas. Zij heeft de regie; niet de regie over wat ze allemaal gaat doen, maar de regie over wat ze ni\u00e8t gaat doen, of n\u00f2g niet, anders, of later. Het gaat haar wel lukken. Want ze is al recordhouder afknappen. Nu wil ze recordhouder opknappen worden.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Vorige week zei een vrouw \u2018Het gaat niet goed met me\u2019. Tissues. In \u00e9\u00e9n jaar had ze acht forse tegenvallers. Moeder dement, vriendin overleden, conflict met de baas, collega ziek, financi\u00eble ellende, verhuisd, puberzoon met problemen, man ontslagen. En nu was het op, burn-out, afgebrand, uitgeput. Soms duikt in zo\u2019n verhaal oud verdriet op, oude […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-207","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dokteren"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/207","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=207"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/207\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":640,"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/207\/revisions\/640"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=207"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=207"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nicovanduijn.nl\/wpblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=207"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}